You simply ignored the signs.
They were there, but you ignored them.
Sign One: Several of the pictures on the church website included your husband and the other woman. They were often surrounded by several other high school kids from the youth group, but your husband and the other woman were often the only adults.
Sign Two: Late night meetings that your husband insisted he had told you about. On several occasions your husband was not home when you expected him. When you texted or called, he always insisted that he had told you about the evening meal or meeting with a client who was in from out of town. It was never very late when he got home, but you are certain he had not mentioned these meetings that seemed to appear out of the blue.
Sign Three: Long periods of time when your husband was unavailable. You could not reach him on the phone, either by calling or by texting. Sometimes when you were on the phone with him, his calls would suddenly drop, even when you knew that he was in a location where he should be getting perfectly good service.
You feel a little foolish now that your husband has announced that he just came from a meeting with his divorce lawyers. He has fallen in love with a family and church acquaintance. she has been divorced from her husband for three years so she was able to recommend a really good family law attorney. He is leaving it up to you. You can file; he can file. It really does not matter how it all plays out, he just wants you to understand that the marriage is over. Immediately. He is moving out over the weekend.
What Do Family Lawyers Do?
Whether you are the unsuspecting wife, or the wife who has known all too long that you have needed to get out of a dangerous marriage, chances are that family divorce lawyers can help you with your case. Whether you are a couple who has only been married a few years and have no children or whether you have been married for 20 years and have three kids, divorce lawyers can help you sort out the process.
Even though most couples enter a marriage intent on keeping their vows, the rate of divorce in America is pretty high. In fact, the latest statistics show that:
- The divorce rate for a first marriage is 41%.
- The divorce rate for a second marriage is 60%.
- the divorce rate for a third marriage is 73%.
Further research indicates that the first marriages that end in divorce typically last eight years. And while divorces are difficult enough for couples with no children, families with children may have even more difficulties. For instance, research indicates that children of divorced parents are twice as likely to drop out of high school. They are also less likely to attend college. Family divorce lawyers may be able to help negotiate settlements and custody terms that can make the process less stressful and hostile.
While some marriages end with an amicable divorce, it often takes two different attorneys or teams of lawyers to help work out the specifics of child support, custody, and sometimes, alimony. Even when things run smoothly, the average length of a divorce in the U.S. is one year. Because of the length of time that a divorce can take, it is important to find an attorney who understands what your goals are and what things are definite and what things are non-negotiable.
Some questions that you might consider asking a potential divorce attorney include:
- are you a general practice lawyer, or do you specialize in divorce cases?
- How many cases do you take at any one time? How do I know that you will give my case the attention that it deserves?
- After hearing about my case, what is the strategy that you will use?
- How do you charge your clients? Is it an hourly rate, or do have a flat fee for a basic divorce?
- Will you allow me to negotiate with my spouse, or will all negotiations be handled through you?
- How many cases did you handle last year? How many of those cases would you consider a success?
